""22 Wives, submit yourselves to your own husbands as you do to the Lord. 23 For the husband is the head of the wife as Christ is the head of the church, his body, of which he is the Savior. 24 Now as the church submits to Christ, so also wives should submit to their husbands in everything.25 Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her 28 In this same way, husbands ought to love their wives as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself.29 After all, no one ever hated their own body, but they feed and care for their body, just as Christ does the church 33 However, each one of you also must love his wife as he loves himself, and the wife must respect her husband. Ephesians 5:22-33""
A friend
of mine sent me an interview of a couple that had been successfully
married for 30 years. He said he was really inspired by the interview as it was
immensely revealing. After inquisitively reading the interview, I called my
fried to convey my point of view and we both agreed that there is a reason God (who
is the creator of marriage), instructed wives to submit to their husbands
and instructed husbands to love their wives as he loves the church. I am aware
of how people have unapologetically tweaked and twitched this particular bible
verse to suit all kinds of things I cannot begin to write today, but that
is far from the point I am striving to make.
My point
is, for so many reasons some of which I will state here, it is better for men
to love their wives. I am not trying to say that a wife isn’t supposed to love
her husband, no, but if she is submitting to you completely don’t worry. Why?
Imagine that you are blind and the world is all dark to you and all you have on
earth is your 13-year-old son who with the help of your cane directs and guides
you everywhere. He leads you wherever you wish or have to go because you are
blind. You may not necessarily enjoy that you are at the mercy of your son but what
can you do? This is the way I see submission. For your wife to have submitted
to you completely, she has built a sturdy kind of trust for you. For someone
to trust you so much, there is a huge chance that she already loves you deeply.
So you see? By the way, Ladies do not marry a man that you cannot trust for
direction in life assuming you were blind.
It may
take a woman longer to fall in love with you, but when she eventually does, her
love endures long. Men on the other hand fall in and out of love
faster. If a man doesn’t love you, nothing you do will change that,
and if a man decides to love a woman, even if there are a 100 Victoria secret
models in the room his eyes will penetrate all of them like a ghost and focus
only on the woman he loves. All her imperfections will become perfect in his
eyes. Marriage comes with a lot of unavoidable challenges but we will all agree
that a woman makes and builds the home; she takes a house and turns it into a
home. It’s just like building a Lego, you only work with what you have, and if
some pieces of the Lego are missing, you will not be able to come up with a
complete structure even if you tried.
That is
it, if she has peace and happiness she will invest it into the home she is
building and what more will make a woman happier than knowing that the only man
she loves, loves her even more? Except she is a witch, there will be less nagging, less
misunderstandings, etc. because your love for her is enough. Most men are busy
trying to understand a woman; I say forget that and LOVE HER. Love the hell out
of her and watch her transform into her fullest potential. Personally I can
spot a woman who is loved right merely by looking at her physically. There is
this glow I just can’t explain, but she glows. Men on the other hand want to
know that they are appreciated, they want peace, they want to know that you are
in their corner come what may, and they will go above and beyond to make that
woman happy.
Some say it’s better for the
woman to love the man more, but other than massaging his ego what else will the
marriage benefit from that? Especially in a society like the one I come from
where woman are drained emotionally until they have nothing left. What will her
loving her husband more bring? The man is the head of the home, the main
protector, provider, the one who found you and asked for your hand in marriage.
The one who is the reason you left your family to build a new home with. So isn’t it natural that since he
found you and loved you, swept you off your feet and made you start loving him
eventually, should just continue to love you even more despite the fact that
you eventually fall in love with him?
God is a
wise God and he has never lied. He created marriage, he knows the dynamics of
marriage better than any human, and just like a textbook he gave us the bible,
which has all the necessary instructions on how to be successful in marriage.
The choice is ours as to whether to follow it or not.
